Spring Cleaning

So, on Saturday, Joe and I began the task of cleaning our house.  Or, at least, of cleaning it out.  We went through drawers and drawers of paperwork, piles and piles of...well, everything...cleared out a few closets, filled a few bags full of donations, etc.  As for everything else, well, let's just say that there still remain a number of things on our official Spring Cleaning List that went untouched.  I have estimated that we have about 20 more hours of work to be done--including yard clean-up, basement clean-up, garage clean-up, etc.  Then, the real fun (painting, reorganizing, decorating, etc.) can begin.  My goal is to finish all painting and building projects NO LATER than June 30.  Admittedly, that might be a little bit ambitious, since I can't do very much with my toddler toddling all over the place, as he is wont to do.  Nevertheless, I have to start somewhere, and I have to have goals of some sort, or I'll never get anywhere!

In other news, one of the unexpected delights of living through the first full year in a new home is to see what sorts of perennials are lurking in the garden.  We have all sorts of tulips and daffodils, which are quite lovely, indeed.  We have a lot of work to do outside, but it's nice to take a few moments to stop and smell the roses tulips and daffodils.  At our old place (which we rented), there were two lilac bushes that produced the most fragrant flowers around.  Fortunately for me, I don't sneeze at the mere sight of lilacs, so I could really enjoy them.  I'm excited to discover what other flora-related surprises await me!

And, finally, the blogging universe is overwhelming.  I looked at one blog last night, which, in turn, served as an introduction to about 5980 other blogs, which, then, provided information for 2095890 other blogs.  Etsy is, likewise, overwhelming.  You can buy all sorts of homemade and/or vintage items from countless talented people; it takes so long to go through page after page of "aprons" or "things with owls" or "green rings" or whatever.  But, it's wonderfully fun (and wastes A LOT of time!!)  I am just so impressed by all of the things that people can create...it's amazing how talented this world really is!

Til Death Do Us Part

I just got home from a funeral around 15 minutes ago for one of the sweetest ladies in my church.  The past year and a half had been marked with significant difficulty for her, except, in the last three months or so, she had taken an incredible turn for the better--she seemed to be back to her old self--vibrant, happy, and wonderfully uplifting to the people around her.  Then, one night about three weeks ago, she went to bed normal and her husband found her the next morning in a terrible state.  She was rushed to the hospital, and was immediately admitted to the ICU.  I had the chance to visit her about a week later, and she was hooked up to every tube and wire and plug imaginable.  Her husband was there when I arrived, and he said something that affected me profoundly.  He was brushing her hair away from her face and said, "You know, she would hate to know that anyone was seeing her this way, but, to me, she's as beautiful as the day I met her."  Yeah, I defy you to keep your composure after hearing such a thing.  Everything he did demonstrated the strength and beauty of their marriage which, after she died (last Saturday), I learned was a 58-year old marriage.

Now, I'm certain that my friends, Bill and Doris, had their fair share of arguments.  I'm sure that one, or both, of them blew things out of proportion on a number of occasions.  And, at the viewing last night, Bill told me that he could still hear her yelling at him about this or that.  I know that their life wasn't always perfect; they experienced significant pain, disappointment, fear and shame.  And yet, through it all, their marriage remained strong.

Doris would be happy, I think, to know that she and Bill have left an impression that will last well beyond their years on this earth, but she wouldn't take credit for a bit of it.

Growth.

So, on Friday, I was at the gym doing pull ups.

Ok, ok, I know what you're thinking--pull ups?  Really?  YES!  It's crazy, but it's true.

And, when you do pull ups on the particular machine that I was using, you face directly into a mirror.  And, so, it was at that moment that I noticed this weird bump on my right arm.  And, then, I immediately noticed it on my left arm, too.  It was the strangest thing...and then, out of nowhere, I figured out what those bumps were:  BICEPS!!!

It's true, I actually do have muscles.  And they're doing what they're supposed to be doing!

And, then, yesterday, the weather was so completely marvelous that it would've been nothing short of tragic to not spend a significant part of the day basking in the glory of the sun.  So, Andy and I headed over to the park and walked around with friends of ours for awhile.  Then, another strange thing happened--Joe came to pick Andy up so that I could have some time by myself to...RUN.

WHAT?!?  I RAN?  Yes, and with a moderate amount of success, I might add.  I'm in no way ready to be competitive in any sort of race, but to know that I ran at all is a HUGE change (of pace...haha) for me.

I have discovered that I am profoundly grateful for how well my body is functioning at this point.  It's not perfect, but I have legs that work, hands that work, a brain that works, a heart that works, lungs that work, a voice box that works...if I were being sold by Kelly Blue Book standards, I wouldn't quite be at "excellent", but I sure would be at "Good."  YAY! :0)  (I can't believe I just compared myself to a car).

Also, I am a total bandwagon NCAA basketball fan every March.  I get into bracketology, it's true.  And I love a good victory by the underdog (unless that underdog is playing against WVU).  March has, thus far, brought me so many delights!!!

Our House...Towards the End of the Street

I need to fix this house.  It's not broken, per se, but there are numerous things that I would like to do to A) Enhance the functionality and B) Enhance the aesthetic, both of which will C) Enhance the resale value whenever we might decide to sell (which wouldn't be for another two years at the very least).

I am on a big kick to de-clutter each and every room/closet/etc.  However, there are things I'm having a hard time getting rid of.  Some things are sentimental, it's true, but other things are sentimental to other people and so I feel like it would be wrong for me to cast off something that, for me, is not worth holding onto, but, for them, is totally worth keeping.  And, of course, there are all of those other things--the things that I'm not currently using, but would hate to have to buy again if and when I did need them, even if I might not necessarily ever need them again, knowing that I have them now.  Sheesh--that's a mouth full!

I also really want to spend our money wisely, which means that we are seeking to enlist as many people as are able and willing to help (and they really need to be able to positively contribute...I've learned that not all eager volunteers are not nearly as talented as they are enthusiastic, which is a crying shame).  I want to build shelves for storage in the basement, shelves for closet storage, paint several rooms (and their ceilings and the trim), create some decor for a few of the rooms, completely fix the porch, remove all existing (mostly dead) landscaping and replace it with low maintenance stuff and a few herbs, etc.  I might have some lofty goals, though I really don't think they're out of the realm of possibility.  If I could just do my part and completely de-clutter, that is.  Which brings me back to my first conundrum regarding the elimination of things.

Also, I've recently started subscribing to a number of Martha Stewart-related e-newsletters, but to do many of the things that they suggest, I must already be well-organized.  Sheesh.

I'm saying "sheesh" a lot in this little bloggity-blog.  Just an observation.

Anyone want to come help me clean out/throw away/donate/decorate/paint/organize/etc. my house?!?

Actually laughing out loud

So, I decided that I needed to read something "light", after having just finished a stolen-identity-mystery novel (which I only chose because it was among the top 10 books of 2009), which followed a depressing and rough-around-the-edges account of homeless New York, which followed a depressing fictional-but-might-as-well-be-true account of a young girl going through the foster care system in greater Los Angeles.  And, I can't remember what was before that (though I could look it up), but it was probably heavy, too.

Because I needed something slightly fluffy, as it were, I headed to the Young Adult section at the library.  I consider myself to still be a young adult, so I convinced myself that I had every right to be perusing that section's wares.  I proceeded to look at, and check out, three books by Meg Cabot.  One was "The Princess Diaries" because, I've seen the movie a bajillion times, of course, so I thought I should also read the books.  I also got one called "Boy Meets Girl" and I got the one that I'm reading now, "Big Boned."  Even though it, too, is a murder mystery (totally didn't see that coming when I checked it out), it is absolutely hysterical.  I am a smile-to-myself-when-something's-funny-in-a-book-or-on-t.v. kind of person.  It takes a lot for me to actually laugh out loud (unless I'm watching "Community", at which point it becomes hard for me to stifle much laughter), but this book has successfully brought me to a place of utter hilarity.  It totally meets my need for light and fluffy, and is such a fast read that it also helps me to plow forward in terms of achieving my reading goals for the year.  I started it on Monday night, and I think the likelihood is great that I will finish it tonight.  Granted, it's only 275 pages, give or take a few, but still, it's not as if I have endless hours to read for funsies.  What a surprisingly enjoyable change of pace.

Also, I don't know about where you live, but where I live, it is beautiful.  We have had a few picture-perfect days lately, which do nothing but lift my spirits.  I'm even (sort of) looking forward to beginning the task of landscape clean-up, once everything dries a bit.  We have branches and limbs and other bits and pieces of nonsense all over our yard.  It actually looks like we might have to cut two trees down, based on their precarious positioning (thank you, 30" of snow).  It should be fun, though.  And, as I mentioned, it is beautiful outside, which makes it totally worth it!!!

Pressing on toward the goal...

So, you may or may not remember that one of my goals for 2010 was to read the Bible in its entirety.  I mentioned, too, that I think this is something that everyone should do, regardless of their own beliefs.  At this point, I have completed nine books:
*Genesis
*Joshua
*Judges
*Ruth
*Job
*Isaiah
*Matthew
*Romans
*1 Corinthians

I realize that that list represents a fairly scattered take on the texts, but I have been following a pre-made list (kind of), and that is the reason for the randomness.

Here's the thing: even with only reading nine books out of sixty-six, it is hard for me to imagine believing in any thing other than God, Jesus Christ and the Holy Spirit.  I mean, there's a darn good case to be made, to say the very least.  Also, my understanding of the Scriptures is enhanced this time through, even though some of the text are very familiar to me, which is terrific.  In some areas, it's like additional sentences were added to clarify things for me, though, in reality, they've been there all along.

But here's one of the things I've really been thinking about: what should our actions be?  I feel like so many people refuse to do things in their lives because they feel like they're not good enough.  If only they could kick this habit or that addiction or whatever.  But Scripture tells us that we should focus on the doing of things, and that, in time, we will be free of the things that hold us back.  It's kind of like that oft-touted phrase, "Fake it until you make it."  If we would just do things that indicate that we are living the life to which we are called, then it follows that we will be living the life to which we're called. Of course, that means entirely different things for different people--your gifts are not the same as mine--and that's a good thing.  But, the same idea still holds--it goes back to the whole idea of "already and not yet."  That is a phenomenon that is applied to Jesus' talk about the kingdom of God being ushered in.  He basically says that the kingdom of God is already on Earth, but not yet.  This is a bit of a perplexing concept to get my mind around, but I think it helps to think of it in a sort of cyclical way, which is also how I think about my freedom from sin and my ability to follow where He leads.  For example, we are called to humble ourselves.  In the very act of admitting that we aren't very good at being humble, we demonstrate humility.  And, at the very moment that we begin to do things that are good and right, our sins don't cause us to need to be humble, and yet, because we're doing good and right things, our humility has remained in tact.  We can't change unless we admit that change needs to happen, and we can't change permanently unless we allow God to come in and do that work for us.  I've tried to do a lot of things on my own, and I'm a pretty heard-headed, go-getter kind of person (when I really want something, anyway).  But all of my single-handed attempts at success have failed dismally.  Even still, I feel as if I should engage in doing the things to which I'm called, and trust that they will be done well and to completion through God's power in, and over, my life.  When God is along for the ride, and we let Him in, failure is an utter impossibility.  Who wouldn't want that?

Getting Correct Change and Getting Change Correct

I remember a day a few years ago when I was headed out of town, but hadn't had a chance to eat before hitting the road.  I stopped by the closes fast food joint to grab some sustenance for the drive.  I paid with a ten, but was given change as if I'd paid with a twenty.  The woman who served me had a hard time hearing and an even harder time handing my drink to me without spilling.  I certainly didn't want her to bear the burden of a cash drawer that was (at least) ten dollars short at the end of the day.  I wouldn't have wanted her to regardless of her other work-related challenges, but I felt the need to be especially sensitive to her error.  I pulled into a parking spot and ran in to the restaurant.  I waited in line and, once I got to the cash register, I noticed that the man who was taking orders happened to also be the manager.  I explained the circumstances and returned the extra money to him.  But here's the surprising part: he was utterly shocked that someone would do something like that...he couldn't believe that a person who received extra change would have taken the time to notice the discrepancy and, furthermore, couldn't believe that they would take the extra two minutes to return the money.  As I walked out, another customer stopped me and applauded me for my apparently praise-worthy efforts.  I was sad that honesty seemed like something that, apparently, was hard to come by.

Of course, I'm not perfect by any stretch, but I can't imagine being the kind of person who knowingly steals.  I mention this because I just looked at a box of books that had been packed up for awhile, and discovered that I have been holding on to a couple of books for a few YEARS now, not realizing I still had them, and I need to make every effort to return them as soon as possible.  It was unintentional stealing, I guess...or very very longterm borrowing...but, nevertheless, I've been holding onto things that aren't mine.

I think we all hold on to stuff.  Maybe it isn't "stuff" in a physical sense, but it's all that nonsense that clouds our ability to see clearly, to make good decisions, to be the best people that we can be.  I can point to any number of things that have been (or continue to be) barriers for me at one point or another in my life: fear, pride, worry, laziness, confusion, anger, etc.  I take great comfort in knowing that I don't always have to be held back by those things.  I can face the question marks in my life with confidence knowing that, somewhere along the line, the answers will reveal themselves in one way or another.  I can't predict the future (accurately, anyway), but I also don't really need to.  I just need to be changeable.  I need to be flexible.  And I need to be humble to the nth degree.

(Yesterday's sermon at my church spoke to this topic, and it has been something that I've been thinking a lot about in recent months, anyway, so now it's a particularly potent subject to ponder!)

5 Things:
1. It is just beautiful outside.  The sun is warm and vibrant and people are happy and the birds are headed back this way!
2. My friend, Ashley, just won a very exciting prize for her work in poetry.  She's quite gifted, and it's nice to see her gain appropriate recognition for her efforts.
3. More of my friends are pregnant, which means there will be more baby-sized sources of joy entering this world over the next several months!!
4. I got three(!!!!!) new skirts, all for 50% off (and in a size that makes me happy).
5. The three of us had a really great weekend spending time together.  Plus, Joe and I got to go out on a mini-date, I got to get some work done at the house while Joe and Andy spent time together, and Joe got to hang out with the guys while Andy and I played yesterday afternoon!

Read 'Em And Weep...

If you haven't noticed, I love to read.  At the beginning of the year, I set several goals for myself.  One of those goals was to read at least two books per month.  They have to be books that I haven't previously read, and children's books (as in, the board books that I read to my son 209905 times per day) don't count.  I am keeping a spreadsheet to assist me and, according to it, I have completed seven books this year, and I am ten pages away from completing the eighth.  I'm essentially on pace to read at least 52 books this year which, in some ways is great (it would blow my goal out of the water), and, in other ways, is frustrating (I have SO MANY MORE that I'd like to read).

The book that I am just about to finish is called Land of the Lost Souls: My Life on the Streets, by Cadillac Man (his street name--his actual name is never fully revealed in the text).  It is the account of one man's life living in almost all of the New York City boroughs.  It deals with drugs, violence, prostitution, prejudice and all sorts of other things that we'd like to pretend happen in some other place, not where we are.  It is very challenging in that respect.  Even more difficult is reading the various accounts that describe how people got to that particular station in life, and the extremes that money of them will go to as a means of seeking escape.  However, in the midst of all of this are some hugely redeeming things.  Cadillac Man is a wonderfully generous, selfless person.  He describes an incident that occurred shortly after he became homeless.  Christmas was approaching, so there was a greater sense of generosity in the air, but Cadillac Man was especially excited about the conversation that he had with a woman who liked his hat (which read, "give kids hugs, not drugs").  It wasn't until several moments after that exchange that he realized the woman was Jackie Onassis.  Furthermore, when he looked into his hand to see what she had put there, he discovered a ten dollar bill.  And this is where it gets good: he put it into a collection bucket that someone was manning at a nearby church because he, being homeless himself, recognized that there were other people who needed money more.  Amazing.

Also, the story tells a lot about forgiveness, about faith, about hope, honesty and loyalty.  It also offers a powerful reminder that these are people who deserve our respect and our support.  He admits that there are plenty of people who are homeless and who also happen to be alcoholics, or drug addicts, or other things that make we "outsiders" (his term) skeptical.  But, there are also people for whom life has been atrociously difficult.  There is one woman who became homeless because that was a better choice than remaining at home with her father, who abused her and her sisters as a way of dealing with the fact that he had also just killed their mother.

For me, this is a dose of reality.  I don't ever want to allow my perspective to become so skewed that I no longer understand the scope of things like homelessness.  I don't want to become emotionless when I consider the plight of these people.  This is a pervasive thing in our society, and I don't want to forget this important group--these "lost souls."

People are often eager to do mission work of all sorts in places that are far away, but there seems to be less enthusiasm over doing things locally.  But there is a real need.  Maybe it's not glamorous to work in an area that doesn't require a passport or a plane ride, but the lives of these people are just as important, and the need to meet their needs is just as urgent.

I think that the next book I read will need to be a little bit lighter (though I'm thinking of trying to tackle all of Calvin's Institutes which is not light), but I don't want to ever lose sight of the things that are real and present.  Nor do I want to ever forget, even on the worst of days, just how blessed I am.

5 Things:
1. Books
2. Eye-opening experiences
3. Unexpected generosity
4. Spring arrives this month!
5. Exceeding goals.